Q: How did the farmer fix his jeans ?
A: With a cabbage patch!

Q: What is the slowest racehorse in the world?
A clotheshorse!

Q: Why was the lamb told off for being rude?
A: He would not say 'thank ewe' to his mum!

Q: What do you call a pig who's been arrested for dangerous driving?
A: A road hog!

Q: What do you call a chicken in a shellsuit?
A: An egg!

Q: What did the baby chick say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
A: 'Dad, dad, look what marma-laid'!

Q: What do you call the story of The Three Little Pigs?
A: A pigtale!

Q: Why did the baby turkey bolt down his food?
A: Because he was a little gobbler!

Q: Why did the starstruck chicken cross the road?
A: To see Gregory Peck!

Q: Why did the Roman chicken cross the road?
A: Because she was afraid someone would caesar!

Q: What do you call a pig thief?
A: A hamburglar!

Q: Why did the dirty chicken cross the road?
A: For some fowl purpose!

Q: How do sheep keep warm in winter?
A: Central bleating!

Q: How do chickens dance?
A: Chick to chick!

Q: Which dance will a chicken not do?
A: The foxtrot!

Q: What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo?
A woolly jumper!

Q: Why did the unwashed chicken cross the road twice?
A: Because he was a dirty double crosser!

Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?
A: A bulldozer!

Q: What has two legs and flies?
A: A pig!